If you are thinking about suicide, please reach out now. In the US call or text 988 (988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline). In Canada call or text 9-8-8 (talksuicide.ca). If you are in immediate danger, call 911.
Short answer: I hold, as Christians have for centuries, that taking one's own life is wrong because life is God's gift. But the Bible nowhere says that it is an unforgivable sin, and it never says that a believer who dies this way is lost. Salvation rests on what Christ has done, not on a person's last act. God is compassionate toward the despairing, and He is the only one who sees the whole of a person's suffering.
In This Article
If you have come to this page because you are hurting, I am glad you are here. Please do not read the rest alone if you can help it. Tell someone you trust, a friend, a family member, a pastor or a doctor, and use the numbers at the top of this page. You do not have to carry this by yourself.
If you are here because someone you love has died this way, I am sorry. People in the pews asked me about this in different ways: some in fear for themselves, and some in grief and with a heavy question about where their loved one now was. I want to answer both honestly from Scripture, without hardness and without false comfort.
What Does Scripture Record About Suicide?
The Bible records a small number of deaths by suicide, and it reports them without endorsing them. They are Abimelech (Judges 9:54), Saul and his armor-bearer (1 Samuel 31:4), Ahithophel (2 Samuel 17:23), Zimri (1 Kings 16:18) and Judas (Matthew 27:5). Most of these were men whose lives were marked by violence or betrayal, and the Bible does not dwell on the circumstances. I will not describe them either. Some also point to Samson, but his aim was to defeat the Philistines, and I do not think he belongs on the list.
It is important to see what else the Bible shows. Many of God's servants reached a point where they wanted to die, and none of them was condemned for the feeling. Elijah, after a great victory, fell into exhaustion and fear:
He came to a broom bush, sat down under it and prayed that he might die.1 Kings 19:4 (NIV)
God's response was not a lecture. He let Elijah sleep, sent food and water, and then spoke to him gently. Jonah, Job and the psalmists all had such moments. Even the apostle Paul, who would not take his own life, wrote honestly about it:
We were under great pressure, far beyond our ability to endure, so that we despaired of life itself.2 Corinthians 1:8 (NIV)
Despair belongs to the Bible's story of human suffering. A person who has felt it is not beyond God's reach.
Is Suicide A Sin?
Here I must be straightforward about what I believe. Life belongs to God, who gives it and takes it (Job 1:21). The sixth commandment protects human life:
You shall not murder.Exodus 20:13 (NIV)
Most Christians, myself included, understand that commandment to cover the taking of one's own life as well as that of others, and Paul says our bodies are not our own, for we were bought at a price (1 Corinthians 6:19-20). So I teach that suicide is a wrong, a rejection of God's gift of life. But I say that with a heavy heart, and with two things beside it. First, the Bible does not name it as unforgivable. Second, much of the suffering behind it is illness. Severe depression distorts thinking, and a person in that state is not weighing things as a healthy mind would. You can read more about that struggle in Is Depression A Sin In The Bible?
Can A Christian Who Dies By Suicide Go To Heaven?
This is the question families ask most, and I do not want to answer it with a shrug or with a threat. My understanding of the gospel is this: a person is saved by grace through faith in Christ, who died for all of our sins, past, present and future. The unforgivable sin in Scripture is persistent rejection of the Spirit's witness to Christ, which I describe in The Unforgivable Sin, not any single act, and it is not suicide. If a person truly belonged to Christ, the Bible gives no ground for saying that the last act of a tormented life cancels what Christ did.
neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.Romans 8:38-39 (NIV)
Does that mean suicide is safe or trivial? No. It leaves wounds that reach far beyond the person who dies. Nor can I tell you the destiny of any particular individual, because only God sees the heart. But I can say that I believe in a God who is forgiving, and I refuse to put limits on His mercy that He has not put on it Himself. Other traditions have wrestled with this too. The Catholic Church once treated suicide very harshly, but its current catechism says that one should not despair of the eternal salvation of those who have taken their own lives, and that God can provide for repentance in ways known only to Him. I think that is wise. See also Does God Forgive All Sins? and What The Bible Says About Forgiveness Of Sin.
What Comfort Is There For Grieving Families?
Grief after a suicide is its own kind of grief. It is often tangled with guilt, anger, questions and a feeling that you should have seen it coming. Please hear this: you are not to blame for another person's death. Hindsight makes things look clearer than they were. Those who love someone in great pain often do everything they can, and illness can hide itself even from those closest.
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.Psalm 34:18 (NIV)
He is close. That is what the verse says, and I would hold on to it before anything else. If you are grieving, do not let anyone tell you that your faith is weak because you are devastated. Even Jesus wept (John 11:35).
What Can You Say To A Grieving Family?
Few words are needed. These tend to help:
- "I am so sorry. I am here, and I am not going anywhere."
- "This is not your fault."
- "I do not have answers, but I will sit with you."
- "I am praying for you. Would it be all right if I brought supper on Thursday?"
Language matters too. Say that a person "died by suicide" rather than "committed suicide," which carries an old echo of crime. Avoid explanations ("everything happens for a reason") and avoid questions about why. Offer practical help, keep showing up weeks later when everyone else has gone back to normal, and encourage grief counselling. Support groups for suicide loss exist in most communities, and the crisis lines above can point you to them.
The church should be a place where this grief is welcome. Our funerals for those who died this way ought to be marked by honest sorrow and honest hope, not silence or shame. For related comfort, see the Bible and miscarriage.
What Would Jesus Say To Someone Who Is Suicidal?
I cannot speak for Him beyond what He has said. But here is what I know of His voice in the Gospels. He does not shame the weary. He invites them.
Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest.Matthew 11:28 (NIV)
He draws near to people in pain, touches them, and stays. He does not say "snap out of it." He says "come." The psalmist knew what it was to wait in a dark place and be heard:
I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry. He lifted me out of the slimy pitPsalm 40:1-2 (NIV)
If you are in that pit, here are steps I would urge, as a pastor and as someone who cares.
- Tell someone today. Call or text 988 in the US or 9-8-8 in Canada. If you are in danger right now, call 911.
- Do not stay alone with the thoughts. Go to a place where there are people, or ask someone to come to you.
- See a doctor. Depression and the thoughts that come with it are treatable medical conditions, and help works.
- Talk to a pastor or a trusted believer. You will not shock us. Many of us have walked with people in the dark.
- Pray the smallest prayer. "God, help me" is enough. He hears it.
Signs To Watch For In Someone You Love
Talk of hopelessness or being a burden, withdrawing from people, giving away possessions, losing interest in things they loved, changes in sleep or appetite, and sudden calm after a long low period can all be signs. If you notice them, ask directly and kindly whether the person is thinking of suicide. Asking does not put the idea in their head. Stay with them, listen without arguing, and help them reach a crisis line, a doctor or emergency services. Do not keep a worrying secret to protect a friendship.
What Verse Helps When Someone Is Depressed?
Psalm 34:18, Psalm 42:11, Psalm 147:3 and Matthew 11:28 are good places to begin. Read them aloud with the person if they will allow it. A verse is not a cure for depression, and it should never replace medical care, but it can be a hand held out in the dark.
Why, my soul, are you downcast? Why so disturbed within me? Put your hope in GodPsalm 42:11 (NIV)
Key Bible Verses About Hope And Suicide
- Psalm 34:18: The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.
- Matthew 11:28: Jesus invites the weary and burdened to come and find rest.
- Romans 8:38-39: Nothing in all creation can separate us from God's love in Christ.
- Psalm 40:1-2: God hears the cry of someone in the pit and lifts them out.
- Psalm 42:11: The downcast soul is told to put its hope in God.
- 2 Corinthians 1:8: Even Paul despaired of life, and God was with him.
- Exodus 20:13: Life is God's gift, and the commandment protects it.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is a good Bible verse when someone is depressed?
Psalm 34:18 says the Lord is close to the brokenhearted, and Matthew 11:28 invites the weary to come to Jesus for rest. Psalm 42:11 and Psalm 147:3 are also good. Verses are a comfort, not a replacement for medical care.
What would Jesus say to someone who is suicidal?
The Gospels show Him inviting the weary and staying close to those in pain, never shaming them. His word is come. If you are struggling, call or text 988 in the US or 9-8-8 in Canada, and tell someone today.
What are three signs of depression or suicide risk?
Talk of hopelessness or being a burden, withdrawing from people and things once loved, and changes in sleep or appetite. Giving away belongings or sudden calm after a low period can also be warning signs. Ask directly and get help.
What to say to someone who's depressed and thinking of harming themself?
Listen without arguing, tell them you care, and ask plainly whether they are thinking of suicide. Stay with them and help them contact 988 or 9-8-8, a doctor or 911 if they are in immediate danger. Do not keep it a secret.
What are some comforting words for the family of someone who died by suicide?
Simple words work best: I am sorry, this is not your fault, I am here. Avoid explanations and keep offering practical help in the weeks that follow. Say died by suicide rather than committed suicide.
